"Risk of Dying Alone" 1/2/21

During my morning meditation, I was visualizing my routine of suiting up in my Mid-Eval armor.  I then heard, "Risk of dying alone."  This thought has caused me anxiety for many years.  I am the youngest of seven children.  Two of my siblings have committed suicide and my mother died four years ago at the age of eighty-four.  My father just turned ninety-one on December 24th, 2020.  I am forty-eight.   The rest of my siblings are in their fifties and sixties.  Sometimes my anxiety gets the best of me.  I fear I could possibly out live the rest of my family members and all of my loved ones.  I work really hard at balancing and maintaining my health: mentally, spiritually and physically, on a daily basis.  In addition, there is longevity on both sides of my family.  My grandma on my mom's side lived to ninety-three.  My dad's oldest brother is hundred and five years old!

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