Insights not Spite

Tuesday, July 2nd During evening meditation, I asked my Spiritual Guide Somoya what I need to know from today.  I then heard and internal voice say, "Kels. Make it or break.  Gifts." My take away from Somoya's message is that I continue live by old patterns and need to break them.  Due to my insecurities at times, I will pass the baton, and grant others to decide what my strengths are.  If others are not excited or supportive, than I doubt myself and my abilities. Kels never tells me what to do.  She is ALWAYS supportive of my gifts, no matter what I choose to do with them.  When I am feeling insecure or scared, I then resort to my old patterns.  In my head I believe that her words, tone, and or excitement can "make it or break" my gifts.  This is not on her, but myself.  

Monday, July 1st During morning meditation, I asked my Spiritual Guide Somoya what I needed to know for today.  I then heard and internal voice say, "Make a demotion." I feel this could pertain to my wanting to partner with my friend Eric to put on paid presentations and deciding if this is the right direction to go.   From the beginning, he hasn't seemed very interested.  I feel he is engaging out of kindness and just trying to be supportive.  He seems doubtful that the presentations will be a success without the cognitive method having some data to support its effectiveness.  Each time we meet, his energy is low.  He has a lot on his plate.  We don't really make anything manifest on paper.  There is just quite a bit of talking.  Once, I mentioned that a few people in our workplace have interest in assisting me in collecting the data on inpatient, Eric stated to resume working on the presentation thereafter. I feel put off.  I do realize I am the one who is see