I Am a Perfectionist
Sunday, January 1/13/19
During morning meditation, I spoke to my Spirit Guide Somoya. I asked her what I needed to know for the day. I then heard an internal voice say, "I am a perfectionist."
I feel this part of my personality is a blessing...and a curse. By being a perfectionist with my academics was a curse. It lead to me burning out early, and barely making it through high school...emotionally. I was a straight A student, up until my senior year. I ended up with a 3.9 cum, in spite of my learning challenges. I secretly felt suicidal. I quietly went to my brother Pat for support. I couldn't bare to share these dark feelings with my parents. I didn't want to worry them. They were already overwhelmed. My parents were constantly dealing with problems involving a couple of my older siblings. Pat encouraged me to work on being less of a perfectionist. He encouraged me to continue to have fun with competitive cycling. Pat stated I needed to make sure sleep was a priority. Sibling support, sympathy, and empathy got me through this rough patch.
On the other hand, being a perfectionist has paid off with my different professions over the years. All of my jobs have involved some sort of customer service/working with the public. I have always been an excellent employee, because I follow rules and aim to please. I master my skill-sets. I take pride in doing a great job, no matter what the job maybe.
In addition, with being a perfectionist, I developed a cognitive behavioral method to assist myself and others with managing overwhelming stressors, creating daily structure, achieving goals, and get needs met with providers/professional staff. My product is being used at Seattle's County hospital, different parts of the country, and in the UK.
Most importantly, by being a perfectionist, I never stop trying to be a better person, family member, husband, father, and friend. I fail often, but I work really hard to transform and improve as a human being.
During morning meditation, I spoke to my Spirit Guide Somoya. I asked her what I needed to know for the day. I then heard an internal voice say, "I am a perfectionist."
I feel this part of my personality is a blessing...and a curse. By being a perfectionist with my academics was a curse. It lead to me burning out early, and barely making it through high school...emotionally. I was a straight A student, up until my senior year. I ended up with a 3.9 cum, in spite of my learning challenges. I secretly felt suicidal. I quietly went to my brother Pat for support. I couldn't bare to share these dark feelings with my parents. I didn't want to worry them. They were already overwhelmed. My parents were constantly dealing with problems involving a couple of my older siblings. Pat encouraged me to work on being less of a perfectionist. He encouraged me to continue to have fun with competitive cycling. Pat stated I needed to make sure sleep was a priority. Sibling support, sympathy, and empathy got me through this rough patch.
On the other hand, being a perfectionist has paid off with my different professions over the years. All of my jobs have involved some sort of customer service/working with the public. I have always been an excellent employee, because I follow rules and aim to please. I master my skill-sets. I take pride in doing a great job, no matter what the job maybe.
In addition, with being a perfectionist, I developed a cognitive behavioral method to assist myself and others with managing overwhelming stressors, creating daily structure, achieving goals, and get needs met with providers/professional staff. My product is being used at Seattle's County hospital, different parts of the country, and in the UK.
Most importantly, by being a perfectionist, I never stop trying to be a better person, family member, husband, father, and friend. I fail often, but I work really hard to transform and improve as a human being.
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